Vermillion part 5

He lights a cigarette and walks back to his “office” under the bridge. The line has grown longer and the patrons are growing restless. This is his life now. No longer interested in saving anyone, Cairo appears to be facilitating their self-destruction. He notices the sadness that dwells deep inside, the darkest self-loathing that builds like mucus in their tear ducts and pools in the corner of their eye. It affects them like a poison, makes them do terrible things, just to stop the pain. He inhales the putrid substance into his lungs and leans against the wall.

Is that what I am doing?

 

Am I trying to stop the pain of my own loneliness by taking advantage of these people? I don’t care about their money, I just want to get rid of as much of this stuff inside my veins that won’t let me forget, won’t let me block out every single face that was so eager to never see me again.

Alone amongst over seven billion people.

They are empty, every single one of them, they can hold my burden for a little while. They can carry it on their shoulders until the weight becomes too much for them and they come crashing to the floor. I’ll pile them all on top of one another and when there is enough, I will climb that mountain all the way to the heavens and demand my way in again.

I will bleed myself dry before I accept myself as one of them.

His cigarette rips and he realizes that a tear has fallen from his eyes. This is not truly where he wants to be. He needs to be alone with his thoughts. He disregards the two men in suits parked in a nearby car; they have been following him since he got to the house.

Your experiment is going fine boys, by the numbers and off the books.

He heads to the erotic district to find himself a couple of able bodied humans. Maybe witnessing a moment of passion will ignite some compassion inside him again. It’s hard to find love amongst all of this filth but passion is always there. How much can fifty dollars buy? Can it buy humanity some dignity? I doubt it.

The fittest man he could fine and the prettiest girl he could get without a bruise on her face, was the best he could do for now. They walked in silence back to his apartment. They asked him what he wanted, did he want to watch or participate? He just sat at his writing desk and pulled out the top drawer, inside were three sheets of paper and a pen. They shrugged and found a comfortable spot on the window and started their display of passion. He started to write the final letter that I ever received. He told me about a young woman who he supplied the drug with and how she took her own life. He seemed to envy her because he knew that at the moment she leapt she was at peace and it was through a memory of his, a peace that he could never obtain with the same pictures in his mind. He hated them all so much but he hated himself more.

It becomes clear to me now that he never meant to hurt anyone. He watched over us for so long and then became so disgusted with our behavior, he gave up. Like a father who is eternally disappointed with his children, he gave up on us. More than that, he knew that his entire world gave up on him and left him here knowing that he would never succeed. He tried to force them out of himself and even then we found a way to use this as an opportunity for ourselves.

The prostitutes left the room and the men in suits were already there waiting for him to be alone. They found a way to synthesize his blood into a controlled substance that they code named “vermillion”. They devised a clever way to dilute it in drinking water and use it to immobilize their enemies in mass to make a hostile takeover less messy.

I have followed Cairo since he landed twelve years ago. Just outside Perth, Western Australia. He saved my life and I told the government about him. I thought it was too important to keep to myself, I can’t blame it on the head wound I received after the crash; I wanted to be the man who discovered Earth’s first alien visitor. They pushed me into a car, then onto a plane and then dumped me in Texas. I’ve been looking for him ever since. He always knew how to find me, he never hated me. He knew I was the only one who knew who he really was.

He was the hero we never deserved.

Now we are at the abyss we dug for ourselves, looking over at the end.

It started with a bang.